Posted by: susanideus | May 22, 2010

New Mexico At Last

“There are voices which we hear in solitude, but they grow faint and inaudible as we enter the world.” –Ralph Waldo Emerson

As I sat here in the garden of our Bed and Breakfast today, I could feel loads of tension begin to melt away. I felt as if I was breathing freely for the first time in a long time. (Of course that could be the 7% humidity today compared to the 100% we left in Houston on Sat night!) It’s hard to explain, but lately the combination of the “liquid air” from the excessively high humidity and the dense green vegetation has made me feel almost claustrophobic. Here in the desert there is not that sense of being crowded in, but rather there is an austere lovely openness.

This is the sense of the desert hills, that there is room enough and time enough. (Mary Austin)

Seriously, this doesn’t feel like 750 miles from Houston; it seems like another world. It’s quiet, it’s dry, the air is perfumed by the desert vegetation, and the sky is so clear–no haze from pollution or humidity. Of course, this is not an other-worldly perfect place. Nowhere is that. But, for a few days, it will be for me–a time to rest, relax, renew, reconnect with the part of my heart that always remains here in NM.

And THEN…back to Houston to begin the process of moving our life back here permanently!  Yes, I really did say moving…to New Mexico! I feel as though I should pinch myself to see if it’s a dream. To be back here is more than a dream, believe me. Some would liken coming out of a bad period in their life as coming out of the desert. Not so in my life! I embrace this new desert experience after spending so long in a stifling dismal swamp where I always felt lost. The desert is clarity and refreshment and peace.

Doors opened while we visited. Harold was offered a good job, one in his field of hotel engineering management, so it’s a good move for him professionally. It will afford me the opportunity to stay at home for awhile, getting my health and weight issues under control, implementing a new healthier lifestyle for both of us. Praises for second chances!

More later as our move progresses. I’ll leave you with the view from the patio of our soon-to-be home. Nothing beside us, nothing behind us but beautiful openness.  Sigh…

Strolling on, it seems to me that the strangeness and wonder of existence are emphasized here, in the desert, by the comparative sparsity of the flora and fauna: life not crowded upon life as in other places but scattered abroad in spareness and simplicity, with a generous gift of space for each herb and bush and tree, each stem of grass, so that the living organism stands out bold and brave and vivid against the lifeless sand and barren rock. The extreme clarity of the desert light is equaled by the extreme individuation of desert life-forms. Love flowers best in openness and freedom. (Edward Abbey in Desert Solitude)

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Responses

  1. Loved your post, which captures the feel of NM and life in this great state. Also, beautiful quote from Edward Abbey, always a good read and an author who truly reflected life in the desert. Welcome home!

    • Thanks, Sherry! I’ll be so happy to be “home”. This truly will be like a new beginning for us, but in a place we already know & love. Looking forward to seeing you soon! Becca tells me there are a number of occasions for traveling to Albuquerque in the near future, including new babies!

  2. I’m so happy for you! I share your sense of place and being grounded somewhere even though my prairie longing is far away from your desert! I’m looking forward to reading more as you return to the place that holds your heart.

    • We’re so blessed to get to make this much of our dream journey now. We’ll not have a place in the country yet but we’re that much closer, actually a great deal closer. Just the change of climate and circumstances is huge! I will be living at the edge of the high desert and be close to mountains and streams. And I’ll have TIME! I can’t even begin to imagine what that will be like, but I’m having fun dreaming about it!

      I’m still praying for your prairie dream, my friend. It will come, I’m sure of it.

  3. Bravo! You knocked, and the door opened. This is wonderful.

    • It’s been amazing, Kathy! The doors just keep opening, and we’re going through them all. It’s truly like a new beginning. I am SO ready for this!

      As soon as we’re settled, I’m going to be more seriously addressing my body and health issues. A sideline of this, I think, will be that hubby will benefit too–needs to lose some weight and lower BP too. Thanks again for all the good tips–I have the 2 books you recommended I read. Finally–time!! I hope I never take it for granted.


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